forty-one

Sad news

41 — Tue, 29 May 2007 01:32:10 +0000

Of course, the search is on for the next incarnation of Charles Nelson Reilly. It could take a few years before they locate and train the next one, so we’ll be without leadership, spiritual guidance, and game show hijinks for a time. Hopefully everyone will behave themselves until then, or else we’re in danger of descending into chaos.

I need my beauty rest

41 — Wed, 23 May 2007 11:46:47 +0000

This morning around 5:00 the cat jumps up on the bed and prowls around my head.

Cat: Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow, meow, meow!!!
41: Shut the fuck up, cat!
Cat: …

Wow. Who knew it would work?

Mom, do you ever get that not-so-fresh feeling?

41 — Wed, 09 May 2007 23:14:01 +0000

41: So, yeah, I’m just kinda frustrated because it’s been so hard to make friends around here.
41′s Mom: Wait… is this about what’s-his-face?
41: Uh, no. I’m pretty much over him. I’m talking about regular friends. Meeting men isn’t a problem. But I could use a steady man, too.
41′s Mom: Well, you know what you need to do? You need to find a good church and start attending regularly. Find a big one that has singles groups, and you’ll meet good Christian men there.
41: Yeah, I guess. But what about women friends?
41′s Mom: Yeah, they’re there, too. But no kidding, the men who go to the church singles groups are looking for a good woman to settle down with.
41: Guess that rules me out, heh heh. But what if I don’t like these guys?
41′s Mom: Then go to another church. Just shop around until you find the right one.
41: “Uh, the dudes in this church singles group aren’t hot enough, so I’m going to another church!”
41′s Mom: “And your cake and coffee sucks, too. I’m sure the refreshments are better at the church down the street.”
41: I love you, Mom.
41′s Mom: I love you, H… I mean, 41.

Nerd

41 — Fri, 04 May 2007 00:51:37 +0000

I stole this from Kristina, and she can’t do anything about it.

What Be Your Nerd Type? Your Result: Science/Math Nerd (Absolute Insane Laughter as you pour toxic chemicals into a foaming tub of death!) Well, maybe you aren’t this extreme, but you’re in league with the crazy scientists/mathmeticians of today. Very few people have the talent of math and science is something takes a lot of brains as well. Thank whosever God you worship, or don’t worship, so thank no deity whatsoever in your case, for you people! Most of us would have died off without your help.
Literature Nerd
Social Nerd
Musician
Gamer/Computer Nerd
Artistic Nerd
Anime Nerd
Drama Nerd
What Be Your Nerd Type? Quizzes for MySpace

Maybe I could spray some Febreze

41 — Tue, 01 May 2007 20:29:05 +0000

My office totally smells like old man right now.

41 Exposed!!!

41 — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 17:59:40 +0000

Poppy Mom busts out the Barbara Walters-style soft lighting for a candid one-on-one interview. Mustn’t let her make me cry…

1. What happens when you eat nothing but blue foods for an entire weekend?

Seriously? What kind of moron would do that?

2. Did you move to D.C. just because it’s easier access to John Edwards?

Yeah, that and the likelihood of seeing that Free Government Money dude that wears the question mark suits. But when I got here I found out that John Edwards had moved back to North Carolina. Apparently he’s trying to line up a job here so he can move back. The question mark suit guy is still here, though, thank God. He drives a Bug with question marks on it.

3. How many Communist countries have you visited?

Officially, two. I’ve been to Cuba twice. And I’ve been to China, except I only went to Hong Kong so I guess that doesn’t really count as for real China. So, uh, one.

Oh, and I live just next to the People’s Republic of Takoma Park. Does that count?

4. What St. Louis food item do you miss most?

None. The only ones I cared for (toasted ravioli, frozen custard, St. Paul sandwiches) I can either get at a few places here or easily make at home. The greater the distance between me and Provel “cheese” and tastes-like-ass Imo’s pizza, the better.

That said, while not an actual St. Louis food, I do miss good crab rangoon. The crab rangoon around here sucks. The wrappers are all wrong, and the filling just isn’t right. Might have to start making my own.

5. I’m a woman. Are you a machine?

Sadly, no.

Goodbye, interview.

OK, so I know only like two people read my blog, and both of you are functionally illiterate, but I’m still going to put it out there…

Now it’s someone else’s turn to play if they wish: Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” I will respond by asking you five questions in the comments here on this post so check back here. I get to pick the questions. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

A walk ruined

41 — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 13:31:14 +0000

OK, kids, listen up. If it’s a really nice day out, and you feel like hanging out with your friends and singing a song in a large grassy field which is often crossed by people on their way from their offices to the parking lot, please sing something other “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” Seriously, either play something non-stomach-turning or keep that shit in your dorm. You’re lucky I didn’t walk over and ~~break your guitar and beat your asses~~ politely ask you to stop.

It’s dots or nothing

41 — Wed, 11 Apr 2007 04:02:27 +0000

As I watched Idol tonight (shut up), I kept hoping that someone would ask Jennifer Lopez to help them through “Taco-Flavored Kisses.”
I didn’t think it was possible to dislike Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Denial) any more than I already did, but he has proven me wrong. Because of him and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-$$$), among others, the chance to see a reunited Smashing Pumpkins and The Police for free just a few minutes from my home… officially gone. What a douche.
Shoving a bunch of half-price Easter candy into my face seemed like a good idea at the time. Ugh.
Totally bummed that Jason Isbell isn’t in Drive-By Truckers anymore. I actually liked his songs better than most of Patterson’s and Cooley’s. He’s got a solo album coming out soon and is on tour with Son Volt. Would be nice if he was opening their show here next month. Or if he’d just show up on his own sometime. I’d go to see that.
I was planning on volunteering for Filmfest DC, but when I worked out my film-viewing and regular life schedule, no free days remained. Volunteering is for hippies and losers anyway.

Hey, look over there!

41 — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 03:20:24 +0000

Perhaps I have not been blogging very regularly, but I have been taking a good number of pictures lately. Please enjoy them while I figure out what to blog about. It’s not that life has been boring or uneventful, it’s just I’ve nothing I’d like to share right now. Except the pictures. Seriously, take a look. You like.

What a drag

41 — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 22:01:00 +0000

Since I started working on a college campus, I’ve noticed something odd. Any given day I’ll be walking to or from my office and will hear in any direction “fffuut-fffuut fffuut-fffuut.” Not sure why but about half of these kids drag their feet when they walk. And I’m not even talking about the flip-flop-wearing twerps, it’s the kids wearing regular tied-to-their-foot shoes. Maybe they aren’t getting the vitamins they need to give them the strength to pick up their feet, or maybe they are just so tired from the awesome responsibility of being a college student — I don’t know. It’s kind of sad, really. But the saddest part is that I’ve considered on several occasions taking these kids aside to ask them how they expect to land a job or find someone to love if they keep dragging those feet. Nobody respects a foot-dragger. Nobody. I’m not fooling, kids. And don’t you know you’re going to wear out the soles of your shoes that way? But I guess mommy and daddy will just buy you another pair, huh? Well, who’s going to buy you new shoes when you’re 42 years old and living under the overpass because you ain’t got no job and nobody loves you and you’re having to turn tricks to support your meth habit?

Don’t even get me started on the idiots who wear pajamas to class. Well, actually, I’m kind of jealous of them.